Hot take: MEN ARE DOPE!

Valentine's is here... and so is the men's conference. For those in the dark, Men's Conference is an illusionary gathering conjured up by men to avoid their partners on Valentine's Day. I hear there will be an actual conference this year, but for this post, ill be referencing the imaginary men's conference. I get it, I get why men would want to get away from all the hype. It goes beyond the financial burden, although that too is significant. We, as a society, knowingly and unknowingly put so much pressure on men to buy expensive gifts, plan extravagant dates, to give give give without reciprocation. No one will question a woman for not treating her man, but when the tables are turned...it's a whole different story. So guys...if you feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders...like you have nothing left to give...it's okay to show yourself some love and take a break, hang out with your boys, rest, re-energize. Please don't misquote me...I'm not encouraging people to ignore their partners on Valentine's...all I'm saying is, it's impossible to pour out from an empty cup .

That was just a side note, this post has nothing to do with the Men's Conference or Valentines... this is an appreciation post for all the amazing men who go unnoticed and unappreciated. You all are my Valentines. I wish I could write a personal note to each and every one of you to let you know that you are seen and valued, but I'll be a typical GenZ and let the internet do all the hard work for me. Why am I doing this, Because I am blessed to know some amazing men, and I don't think I appreciate them enough. These are friends who have held my hand through some really dark times, men who have protected me, provided for me and taken care of me expecting nothing in return. Have I had horrible experiences with men? Yes. However, I acknowledge that the bad experiences are as a result of the individual's questionable character, not their gender. I'll admit that in the past, I have put all men in one basket and labelled all of them just because I had a bad experience with one of them, and I was wrong. There are billions of men on this planet, all with unique features, so there's absolutely no logic in making general statements. The only generalisation I agree with is #fearwomen . Every wise person knows not to underestimate a woman. Women are very powerful, what they choose to do with that power makes all the difference. That is agenda for another day, today let's focus on men.

This is to all the dads who work hard to provide for their families, and who take risks so that their loved ones don't have to. This is to all the single dads who are bringing up beautiful children on their own, you don't always get it right...but you do your best, and it matters. This is to all the amazing men who have to take care of their parents and their siblings, no one will ever fully understand the sacrifices you are making, so it's okay to get frustrated. It's okay to say no sometimes, don't take care of everyone else and forget to take care of yourself. This is to all the men who are in toxic relationships, where all you get is criticism no matter how hard you try... you deserve better bro! You deserve to be complimented, you deserve to be listened to, you deserve respect and you deserve to do the things you love...so go watch that game, or go fishing or whatever it is you are into nowadays... I literally can't keep up with these hobbies. To men who are too afraid to show emotion for fear of being judged. It takes strength to be vulnerable, you do not have to be enslaved to unrealistic societal expectations of how a man should act, would you want the same for your son? To all the men who love to take care of themselves, who work out, get facials and manicures...we should hang out sometime, coz your girl is struggling in all of those areas.

To all the men who make us laugh, sorry we said your jokes are lame, they are, but they've gotten us through some heavy moments. So thank you for the dad jokes. To all the men who fix our bulbs, as a feminist, of course I want to do it myself, but bulbs can be annoying...so I'm glad I can scrap that off my list of things to do. To all the men who clean up after an event, carrying all the heavy stuff, thank you for sweating so that I don't have to. To all the men who have to go through the excruciating experience of explaining every part of a football game...Sir, your patience is unmatched. To all the men who step up and take initiative, who strive to be better with each passing day, who show up for their people...these wonderful, beautiful human beings without whom many things would fall apart.

My dear Valentine's

I am proud of you. I appreciate you. You are a great dad, husband, brother, boyfriend, friend...the world is a better place because you are in it. Remember how valuable you are even when everyone else doesn't seem to see it. Look how far you've come, all the obstacles you have overcome. You have managed to keep your head above the water. You have loved your people so well, you've put smiles on their faces, it's about time someone put a smile on yours.